there is no thickness in 3d, the thickness is always like double glazing windows there is (virtual) air in between so what is going on there, the refraction is counted twice?
Wrong, in 3D thickness is important, but in actual Optic laws, IOR has nothing to do with thickness.
The difference in Octane and some other render engines is that if you use an open object or a single surface instead of a closed volume, the space behind the surface will be considered as a volume with same IOR as the last encountered surface. I recently spoke about that in a other topic : if you model a car and use simple planes for the windows, all the inside volume will be considered as glass, and you will see through the car like through a big lens.
So, when you create windows, you have to extrude the glass planes to get an actual thickness (5 to 10 mm) and set an IOR near 1.45, or you can also cheat with physics and use simple planes, with a very low IOR very close to 1 (1.01 or something like that), to avoid the lens effect.
French Blender user - CPU : intel Quad QX9650 at 3GHz - 8GB of RAM - Windows 7 Pro 64 bits. Display GPU : GeForce GTX 480 (2 Samsung 2443BW-1920x1600 monitors). External GPUs : two EVGA GTX 580 3GB in a Cubix GPU-Xpander Pro 2. NVidia Driver : 368.22.