Whats a good recommendation for number of passes, im letting things run to about 6000, should i go higher or lower or fro phot realistic renders is that good?
It is done when you go "Wow - that is incredible". For lighting that has to come through glass (specular material), the render takes many many more samples to finish. Outdoor daylight render might be < 1000 samples. Indoor, with daylight lighting through glass (caustic_blur = 1) will probably be 5000-10000 samples.
Also (offtopic a bit), don't go too high on your "kernel"->"maxdepth" - I think 6-8 is about right. As you go higher, the render takes longer and there is less contrast (since more light bounces into the shadows). With PMC you can also do some interesting stuff with "direct_light_importance" and "exploration_strength" - but that's an advanced topic you'll need to check the Standalone manual for.
Paul